Baseball, Baseball

Boys are cheats and liars
They're such a big disgrace
They will tell you anything to get to second
Baseball, baseball, he thinks he's gonna score
If you go all the way, then you are a
Horticulturist studies flowers, geologists study rocks
The only thing a guy wants from you is a place to put his
Cockroaches and beetles, butterflies and bugs
Nothing makes him happier than a giant pair of
Jugglers and acrobats, a dancing bear named Chuck
All guys really wanna do, forget it, no such luck!

Rob Schneider is hilarious, but that's not why I'm posting.

I saw a baseball bat break in half yesterday, and it got me thinking, is there a reason why people prefer to use wood bats over metal bats?

I mean, I know major league baseball players make a lot of money, but damn, I'd be pretty pissed if I broke my bat during the game.

Or do they just go, "Oops, there goes another one! Let me just go grab one of my ten other bats sitting over here. I know I brought a couple extra bats along for some reason!"?

Small, Wrinkled, and Green You Are

Yoda kicks ASS.

He's a foot tall, 900 years old, limps around and can't get anywhere without his cane, but somehow still manages to fight villains ten times his size better than any of the other Jedi knights can.

Yoda, my hero you are.

Blind as a Bat

Why do people say "blind as a bat" if bats aren't blind?

It's bad enough that you're already insulting whoever it is you're calling "blind as a bat", but do you really have to go and insult bats as well?

So they can't see very well. Cut the poor creatures some slack. They already have big ears and leathery skin. I'm sure they already get enough crap from the rest of the animal world.

What's next?

I saw a vending machine the other day that sells iPod minis. All I have to say is: finally!

Let me tell you, there have been many a time when I've gone to buy candy (with $250 in pocket change) that I've thought to myself, "Damn, I could really use an iPod mini right now."

Oh, clever, clever people.. what will they think of next?